From: Riffster (nerazzurri@nowayJOSEattbi.com) Date: 2002-04-06 Subject: WC 2002 Thread of the Future Foretold - LONG Here is a look into a crystal ball of posts that we all know are coming in less than two months time...... (yes, I ripped off steved for the title......) ----------------------- (R) Argentina - England - WC 2002 Argentina 2 England 2 Scorers: Crespo (A) 33", Beckham (E) pk - 37", Gallardo (A) 77", Owen (E) 84" This highly anticipated match begins with the Argentines carrying the attack to a somewhat surprised English side. Several times Martyn (subbing for an injured Seaman) is called to make difficult saves from Crespo, Ortega and Zanetti. Then when it seems that the English are regaining more of possession, Hernan Crespo wheels around a stunned defender and beats Martyn far post. Two minutes later Ortega is shown yellow for a late entry on Martyn. The English keeper is bloodied but not bowed and continues on in the match. Michael Owen, whom has not seen much of the ball in the first half-hour finally begins to get service and breaks past an unsteady Ayala, but is then tripped by surprise keeper choice Burgos just as Owen is about to round the Argentine. Beckham then cooly sends Burgos the wrong way to equalize. Just before the half a near rumble is barely avoided after Emile Heskey clatters hard into Burgos, leaving the Argentine netminder writhing in agony on the pitch. Several players get into pushing and shoving matches before the Turkish referee gains control, cautioning Beckham and Chamot for unsportmanlike conduct in the process. The second half proceeds very cautiously for the first half hour as both teams look satisfied to come away with a draw, only a timid header by Scholes and an equally tentative long range attempt by Batistuta are even close to being threats to either team. The all changes in the 75th minute as Gallardo comes on for a frustrated and tired Ortega. Gallardo energizes the moribund Argentine attack and puts Martyn in a tough spot almost immediately with a venturesome chip after picking Scholes pocket at 3/4 field. Not much more than a minute later Gallardo again steals the ball from Scholes' feet and this time finds the back of the net after a winding run across the the area. The English at first fail in their attempts to equalize - several crosses from Beckham go harmlessly into the arms of a bandaged Burgos. But just six minutes from time, Owen escapes the clutches of the Argentine defense and makes a thrilling forty meter dash up the pitch and fires a low screamer near post to beat the desperate attempt by Burgos to cut down the angle. The last minutes of the match are mostly memorable for the continual bickering between players and even benches. But no threat apart from one Beckham free kick that misses the far post by inches is noted. ----------------------------- Re: (R) Argentina - England - WC 2002 (score snipped) > This highly anticipated match begins with the Argentines carrying > the attack to a somewhat surprised English side. Several times > Martyn (subbing for an injured Seaman) is called to make difficult > saves from Crespo, Ortega and Zanetti. Then when it seems that > the English are regaining more of possession, Hernan Crespo > wheels around a stunned defender and beats Martyn far post. The Argentines started diving from the second the match official blew the opening whistle. And that official - what a twat he was! What the hell was Eriksson thinking about starting Martyn over James? And that fat pig Seaman wasn't injured - he had to go to a clinic to have a roast removed from his throat. Also, the bloody Japanese stadium food - what the freak is kelp doing on the menu for a soccer game? Kelp, for chrissakes! Why don't they just fry up a lamb's tail and powder it with sugar!?!? > Two minutes later Ortega is shown yellow for a late entry on > Martyn. The English keeper is bloodied but not bowed and > continues on in the match. Michael Owen, whom has not seen > much of the ball in the first half-hour finally begins to get service > and breaks past an unsteady Ayala, but is then tripped by > surprise keeper choice Burgos just as Owen is about to round > the Argentine. Ortega - I remember him - didn't he shoot someone sometime? They call him the "little donkey" - I call him a big ass. God bless Michael Owen, there is still some decency in the game. Which is more than I could say for that hairy freak the Argies fielded in goal. Martyn played better after the knock than before - maybe he is "better shaken not stirred." > Beckham then cooly sends Burgos the wrong way to equalize. They showed Posh jumping up and down in the stands after the score. Crikey, I swear the bint wasn't wearing any panties! > Just before the half a near rumble is barely avoided after Emile > Heskey clatters hard into Burgos, leaving the Argentine netminder > writhing in agony on the pitch. Several players get into pushing > and shoving matches before the Mexican referee gains control, > cautioning Beckham and Chamot for unpsortmanlike conduct > in the process. That hairy acting freak - should have been in the cast of Gladiator - he could have played all of the Barbarians. Heskey barely touched him. And Chamot slaps like a girlie. > The second half proceeds very cautiously for the first half hour > as both teams look satisfied to come away with a draw, only > a timid header by Scholes and an equally tentative long range > attempt by Batistuta are even close to being threats to either > team. Cautious? How about bloody unconscious? I think the two managers got together and gave each other back rubs at halftime. What a bore the first 30 minutes was. Although it did mean we got some more shots of Posh - but she wasn't jumping anymore - as a matter of fact I swear she was asleep behind those huge shades of hers. > The all changes in the 75th minute as Gallardo comes on for > a frustrated and tired Ortega. Gallardo energizes the moribund > Argentine attack and puts Martyn in a tough spot almost > immediately with a venturesome chip after picking Scholes > pocket at 3/4 field. Not much more than a minute later Gallardo > again steals the ball from Scholes' feet and this time finds the > back of the net after a winding run across the the area. That worthless twit Scholes! I told you all he was a a bleached mongrel in shorts! I can't believe that drunken Swede is putting him on the pitch! Bloody hell! > The English at first fail in their attempts to equalize - several > crosses from Beckham go harmlessly into the arms of a > bandaged Burgos. But just six minutes from time, Owen escapes > the clutches of the Argentine defense and makes a thrilling thirty > meter dash up the pitch and fires a low screamer near post to > beat the desperate attempt by Burgos to cut down the angle. OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! > The last minutes of the match are mostly memorable for the > continual bickering between players and even benches. But > no threat apart from one Beckham free kick that misses the > far post by inches is noted. What were the officials doing here? Snacking on kelp? Or maybe they were smoking it! Anyway, I have never seen so many cheap shots this side of the Sun. Becks isn't such a bad bloke I guess - apart from the fact that Rolls Royce does his hair. ---------------------- Re: (R) Argentina - England - WC 2002 > The Argentines started diving from the second the match official > blew the opening whistle. And that official - what a twat he was! You f*cking English should take a long look at your f*cking league - a bunch of hypocritical cheats pretending they are Gentlemen Athletes. You make me f*cking sick! And yes the official was a twat. > What the hell was Eriksson thinking about starting Martyn over > James? And that fat pig Seaman wasn't injured - he had to go to > a clinic to have a roast removed from his throat. The whole lousy bunch of Anglos are fat pigs - except for Owen - he is a skinny pig. > Also, the bloody Japanese stadium food - what the freak is kelp > doing on the menu for a soccer game? Kelp, for chrissakes! Why > don't they just fry up a lamb's tail and powder it with sugar!?!? Oh yeah - when you could have been having kippers and Yorkshire Pudding? Who are the barbarians here - go paint your face and run in the woods you Druid! > Ortega - I remember him - didn't he shoot someone sometime? > They call him the "little donkey" - I call him a big ass. God bless Yeah he shot someone - your mama in her big c#lo! > Michael Owen, there is still some decency in the game. Which is > more than I could say for that hairy freak the Argies fielded in > goal. With your royal family I wouldn't be too free with remarks about hairy freaks. > They showed Posh jumping up and down in the stands after > the score. > Crikey, I swear the bint wasn't wearing any panties! I think you - how do you say - have some issues here..... LIKE YOUR TASTE IN WOMEN!!! > That hairy acting freak - should have been in the cast of > Gladiator - he could have played all of the Barbarians. Heskey > barely touched him. And Chamot slaps like a girlie. Leave your girlie fantasies out of this newsgroup please. > Cautious? How about bloody unconscious? I think the two > managers got together and gave each other back rubs at > halftime. What a bore the first 30 minutes was. Although it > did mean we got some more shots of Posh - but she wasn't > jumping anymore - as a matter of fact I swear she was asleep > behind those huge shades of hers. That fourth pitcher of Guinness must have kicked in about now - first there are prurient musings of Eriksson and Bielsa rubbing each other down with mineral oil, then your horrid attempt at match analysis, then a return to your fascination with that overmade tart with no singing talent. > That worthless twit Scholes! I told you all he was a > a bleached mongrel in shorts! I can't believe that drunken > Swede is putting him on the pitch! Bloody hell! Well, finally a point (other than your head) is made in the post. Although you are remiss in pointing out that *all* the English are mongrels in shorts. And don't blame SGE for being a stumbling sauceboy, he has to look at this collection of misfits for days at a time. > OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! > What were the officials doing here? Snacking on kelp? > Or maybe they were smoking it! Anyway, I have never > seen so many cheap shots this side of the Sun. Becks isn't > such a bad bloke I guess - apart from the fact that Rolls > Royce does his hair. Just because the biggest adventure in cuisine you have ever had is to put onion salt on MacDonald's fries is no reason to belittle the food choices of others. ---------------------- Re: (R) Argentina - England - WC 2002 > You f*cking English should take a long look at your f*cking > league - a bunch of hypocritical cheats pretending they are > Gentlemen Athletes. You make me f*cking sick! Piss off. > And yes the official was a twat. He should piss off too. > The whole lousy bunch of Anglos are fat pigs - except > for Owen - he is a skinny pig. Don't ever write anything like that about Michael Owen again! As a matter of fact, don't ever write anything again! > Oh yeah - when you could have been having kippers > and Yorkshire Pudding? Who are the barbarians here - > go paint your face and run in the woods you Druid! Why don't you go back to Argieland and mud-wrestle with a Capabary or whatever they're called. > Yeah he shot someone - your mama in her big c#lo! Best arse you will ever see. As a matter of fact Arsenal IS better than you will ever see. Heh. > With your royal family I wouldn't be too free with remarks > about hairy freaks. We have royals. You have short, dumpy generals who look like waiters in bad uniforms. By the way, the rumor is that your currency is now tied to Chilean Bat Guano instead of the dollar - how is it doing by the way? > I think you - how do you say - have some issues here..... > LIKE YOUR TASTE IN WOMEN!!! Is there any Argie bint that anyone outside of Argieland knows???? NO!!!!! That's because they all cannot obtain a pet license to travel!!!!! Heh. > Leave your girlie fantasies out of this newsgroup please. I am sorry you do not like to think about women - must be because you are constantly subjected to so many collections of tripe on two sticks walking about pawning themselves off as females in Argieland. > That fourth pitcher of Guinness must have kicked in about > now - first there are prurient musings of Eriksson and Bielsa > rubbing each other down with mineral oil, then your horrid > attempt at match analysis, then a return to your fascination > with that overmade tart with no singing talent. *BELCH* > Well, finally a point (other than your head) is made > in the post. Although you are remiss in pointing out > that *all* the English are mongrels in shorts. > And don't blame SGE for being a stumbling sauceboy, > he has to look at this collection of misfits for days at a > time. *BELCH* > > OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! > SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! *BELCH* *BELCH* *BELCH* *BELCH* > Just because the biggest adventure in cuisine you have ever > had is to put onion salt on MacDonald's fries is no reason > to belittle the food choices of others. Kelp isn't food - it is insulation. Oh yes - one more thing. *BELCH* ---------------------- Re: (R) Argentina - England - WC 2002 > Piss off. I already did - on a picture of the Queen. > He should piss off too. Now there are fantasies about Turkish referees. Do I hear the strains of Midnight Express here? > Don't ever write anything like that about Michael Owen > again! As a matter of fact, don't ever write anything again! I am sorry about writing that Michael Owen is a skinny pig. I won't write that Michael Owen is a skinny pig again. Don't know why I wrote that Michael Owen is a skinny pig.... ....other than the FACT THAT OWEN IS A SKINNY PIG!!! > Why don't you go back to Argieland and mud-wrestle > with a Capybary or whatever they're called. I believe the proper spelling of that is Capybara. But then worrying about the correct spelling of certain types of South American fauna by someone like yourself is almost like being concerned over the lack of proper operatic range in a sewer rat. > Best arse you will ever see. As a matter of fact Arsenal > IS better than you will ever see. Heh. Same thing. > We have royals. You have short, dumpy generals who > look like waiters in bad uniforms. Our government is NOT RUN BY GENERALS! > By the way, the rumor is that your currency is now tied to > Chilean Bat Guano instead of the dollar - how is it doing > by the way? Why don't you go inspect the Chunnel for leaks - from the outside? > Is there any Argie bint that anyone outside of Argieland > knows???? > NO!!!!! > That's because they all cannot obtain a pet license to > travel!!!!! Heh. Just because your wonderful Sun and Mirror don't feature Argentina's lovelies in lurid spreads doesn't mean there is any lack of natural beauty amongst our female population. > I am sorry you do not like to think about women - must > be because you are constantly subjected to so many > collections of tripe on two sticks walking about pawning > themselves off as females in Argieland. Well if by "not thinking about women" you mean do I not try to look up the dress of some third-rate screech on the television, you are correct. And you're correct here - so there is a first time for everything. > *BELCH* Brilliant. > *BELCH* Encore. > > > OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! > > SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! > *BELCH* *BELCH* *BELCH* *BELCH* Your club song? > Kelp isn't food - it is insulation. > Oh yes - one more thing. > *BELCH* Fortunately this is occurring over the internet. ---------------------- Re: (R) Argentina - England - WC 2002 > I already did - on a picture of the Queen. Now who is talking about lurid fantasy?!?!? > Now there are fantasies about Turkish referees. Do > I hear the strains of Midnight Express here? Maybe you do - I only said that the ref was shite. > I am sorry about writing that Michael Owen is a skinny > pig. I won't write that Michael Owen is a skinny pig > again. Don't know why I wrote that Michael Owen is > a skinny pig.... > ....other than the FACT THAT OWEN IS A SKINNY PIG!!! No matter how many times you say it, you have to live with the fact that there is no one in your bedraggled, godawful league that can compare to the magnificence of the player called Michael Owen. > I believe the proper spelling of that is Capybara. > But then worrying about the correct spelling of certain > types of South American fauna by someone like yourself > is almost like being concerned over the lack of proper > operatic range in a sewer rat. Who the f*ck cares. Go f*ck a Capybara then. > > Best arse you will ever see. As a matter of fact Arsenal > > IS better than you will ever see. Heh. > Same thing. What are you on about? > Our government is NOT RUN BY GENERALS! Heh. It isn't run by *anyone* apparently. > Why don't you go inspect the Chunnel for leaks - from > the outside? Another thing you Argies can only dream of doing.... > Just because your wonderful Sun and Mirror don't > feature Argentina's lovelies in lurid spreads doesn't > mean there is any lack of natural beauty amongst our > female population. Female population of what? Capybara? > Well if by "not thinking about women" you mean do I > not try to look up the dress of some third-rate screech > on the television, you are correct. > And you're correct here - so there is a first time for everything. Yes, there is is - maybe someday you'll have a real government instead of a collection of cowards, corrupt hacks, and tin-star generals. > > *BELCH* > Brilliant. You're too kind. > > *BELCH* > Encore. Thank you. > > > > OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! ENGLAND! OWEN! > > > SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! SHUTUP! IDIOT! > > *BELCH* *BELCH* *BELCH* *BELCH* > Your club song? I was belching your mother's home phone number. > I am stunned by your witty reparte'. Don't try to fool me - I know you're not French. ---------------------- - Riff " (thread snipped) *plonk*" Ster